An adolescent reflection

I felt obliged to share this though I don't know the reason why. Maybe I was touched by this student's writing and the message that she wanted to convey. In my Form 2 English classes, I asked my students to prepare an exercise book as a journal or for creative writing exercises. So, last week I told them to write about "If I were..." This student wrote about her being a "witch" who possesses magical powers. Here's her journal piece (please don't mind the grammatical errors, after all I told them I will not grade them for grammar mistakes in their journal) :

"If I were a witch, I will stop this world then people can't see me but not for forever just for three days I think that's is enough. And I will fly at the sky alone, Beside that I hope I will make all the things in this world become cheap then there's nothing different between rich or poor people. And I hope I can give the life for the people who have passed away, I know I can't do it because I am not a god there's just my dream. And it will be really great if I will change all of the boys and girls become handsome and pretty then nothing (no one) can cry because they were not pretty, handsome or anything then make all the person in this world become good. But one important thing I want to make my mother happy".

What I learned from this girl is that her father had passed away last year. She is a quiet one. I find her writing rather poignant as it shows maturity beyond her years. Perhaps, in this journal piece she is trying to tell me that although her appearance shows a normal student who has a normal, typical life there are some hurts and insecurities lurking beneath.

At first, I was at lost for words or comments. What should I say? Alas, I wrote under the last paragraph:

You are a girl with a big heart and I think if you ever have magical powers, I'm sure the world would appreciate the beautiful and magical things you've done. An excellent journal entry.

Brief Immortality

I found this drawing of me on one of my student's English subject file. I think it's so cute..the drawing kind of look like me and even resembles d way i carry my handbag haha..

Teacher = Superheroes

I often wonder how did my former teachers managed to teach and educate us and mold us to become the person that we are today. They sound like superhumans...Superman and Superwoman in their own right.

Being a teacher myself I just can't help but think of where I could get superpowers like my educators cum mentors. So one day, I stumbled upon this song by Five for Fighting entitled Superman. As I listened, I noticed that the song spoke to me...

Yes, we teachers are human after all, but super to our students.
I just hope that in a miniscule way, I might have inspired at least one of my students.

Let's sing this song together, all you Superheroes regardless of careers.

You are a hero to someone.

I am inspired!!

I'm writing a song...it's been ringing and singing in my head...

it won't stop!!!!!!

My First Sports Day

This is a year of "firsts" I think.
So, finally I got a taste of School Sports Day as the professional benchwarmer.

Not.

After four hot and rainy days, I'm officially sun-burnt and I can see myself as a sephia zebra cos I got a lot of stripes. Note to self: Invest in a good sunscreen...again.

Here are some pics taken during that day, and let them tell you the story...

My job was to manage the "kontinjen kawad". Man, it was so difficult just to get the kids to queue up.

Finally...berbaris juga kamu sanaaaa padang!!


Here's the teacher advisors and some students for our team - Team Kelisa! FYI only our team has matching t-shirts...woot woot!!

My teacher friends and I pun kena suru berbaris ikut budak...tiapalah hehehe

Run, Kelisa, RUN!!!!!

Here's some of the students...duduk2 tepi padang...

That's all I could capture...my digicam went out of batt the moment our team were crowned CHAMPIONS!!!!

WooTWoooTTT!!!

I say the darnest things...

Today is the day where I will be meeting my "children's" parents or guardian.
I never liked this part of my job - the part where I have to tell them that their child needs "special attention" and "behaviour adjustments" as well as "anger management".

I am lucky that the parents are mostly supportive and they never sided their children, knowing that bringing them up in school is my part and they will continue the education at home. I was quite nervous to begin with, I had been practising at home with these lines, "Kak/ Encik...anak Encik ni kira okay dari segi...bla..bla...bla..." and hoping that whatever comes out of my mouth will not offend their feelings nor intrude with their parental role. But there are times where my mouth and my frank nature came out and I do admit made me a fool out of myself. Take scenario A for example :

A's Mother : Anak sia ni cigu memang nakal bah...selalu juga sia marah dia ni...suka dia lumpat-lumpat di sana sini kalau di rumah, sama juga dia di sekolah...

Me : Ya, kak...kalau nyawa dia ni bulih beli sana kadai dua ringgit nda apa juga kan?

Here's Scenario B:

B's Father : Kalau dia nakal ni cigu, kasi tau seja sia terus tarang!

Me : Ya, memang dia nakal.

B's Father : Mimaaaaangggggg bah dia ni! Ingat bershuffle ja...ko tingu la baju dia tu. Baju bershuffle dia pakai. Tapi pelajaran dia tidak ingat.

Me : Ingat ah, B...dalam PMR tiada subjek Kemahiran Bershuffle. Kita ada Kemahiran Hidup saja.

To be frank, what should I say to their parents?

When an ex-student texted...

I received several text messages from a former student in KK. Here are some of the text messages...

The above message just made me laugh my heart out. I am still remembered after two years? I think I call that a personal achievement. ^-^


Note to future practicum teachers : VOICE PROJECTION COUNTS!!! This is evidence that you really have to work out those diaphragms..

The above message reminded me of how fun can affect learning. And yes, teach English using songs...you'll enjoy and they'll enjoy it too. But somehow, I wonder why my former methods just didn't really work in my current school. Is it lack of language power? Or just a matter of spoon-feeding culture? Just a food for thought.

Sometimes, I think as teachers we need to bring in the enthusiasm and creativity of a trainee teacher and combined it with the wisdom and practicality of a veteran teacher.

Let's just hope there'll be less administration workload and more focus on the teaching and learning process. Oh, one more...more stability to the education system please...I know we have to keep up with change but sometimes a few things is lovely just the way it is. I hope that someday we'll have an education system and education culture that we can call our own.

P/S: This is just a matter of personal opinions. I do not have any intention of hurting anyone's feelings. Sorry if I did. Yeah, really.

Second Semester Starts

Yeayyyyy...sekolah!!!!!!!

Hehehe...I sounded excited, but hell yeah...I must be.

As usuall, the school semester starts quietly with many absentees and many paperwork to be done. Students come and go to and from my table, asking for their English marks or just to show their faces and told me they missed me (yeah, right kids...no extra marks although I am flattered).

My day started with a kindred spirit asking about my beloved car and told me that I was asked a very high price just to change the clutch lining and the timing belt. Damn, I should have called him before embarking on any vehicle related endeavors. Then he asked me about the house at Minintod where he is quite persistent to ask me to be his neighbour.

"Our children can play together...in which yours will be at the losing side,"he said.

Haha.

"I need a spouse to help me pay the loan...find me one?" was my reply.

Then, ShortyHotStuff sauntered in. What impeccable timing.

I saw an eyebrow flash from his side and I smiled sheepishly.

We exchanged glances and smiles ^-^

Now, harmless flirting is vital in the workplace because it could make a dreary day lively. It's a pity he is not ample in the height factor. Sigh.

All started well and it ends well.

A good first day indeed! WooT!!!

The Beauty is Back!

Please don't mind the narcisstic title. Sometimes one need to be self-centered. After all, your happiness depends on you alone. I received a princess treatment today (to an affordable price) and the stylist said i'm divine,even the shampoo girls said i'm pretty. It's true! No bull..haha. Actually they should say that! I'm a paying customer! Anyway, all self loathing disappear today!

LAD - Less Alluring Day

I don't feel as beautiful and as bouncy today
I don't know why
Could it be the hormones
Or just a bad day
A touch of lipstick doesn't help me smile
I felt as if I have walked a mile
Slumped and dreary
Heavy and fat
I felt less alluring because of that
I tried to walk in high heels
They say it'll help you feel tall
All I can say is, I just felt rather small
I tried to smile
But all I see is just a snarl
My hair is like lifeless hay
Eventhough I conditioned it every other day
Damn, what is wrong me
Could it be the aftermath of yesterday?
Argh!
Forget about it
I am going out anyway.

P/S: Forgive me for the bad poetry.

I Got Knocked Down But I Got Up Again

I get knocked down, but I get up again You will never gonna see me down - Chumbawamba


I received the news that my application had been rejected. At this moment, I feel a mixture of emotions - relieved that the wait is over; anticipation for the next application and of course, sadness because of rejection. But Sad is such a melodramatic word. I can't describe the emotion I am feeling right now...it's like rojak waiting to be puked out of my stomach.

Sour grape much? Maybe.

Disappointment? Yup.

Resentment? A little.

But I am going on, to continue what I haven't finished and to just keep on trying, even though it seemed silly to fight over a losing battle.

I'm just grateful that somewhere there were total strangers who were willing to help and guide me in this ordeal. And I consider that as a miracle.

So what if they knocked me down? I am not going to let myself down.

"Every search begins with beginner's luck and ends with the victor's being severely tested."
-The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho.

Book CRAZY!!!!

I blame it on Mel.

I get shopping crazy whenever I went out for retail therapy with my best gurl, Mel. But this time it's minus the guilt...woot!!

I knew I have another book collection to complete. But I just had to have it.

Now.

Right now.

So, me bought meself another four books by Paulo Coelho.

Brida
This is the story of Brida, a beautiful young Irish girl, and her quest for knowledge. On her journey she meets a wise man who teaches her about overcoming her fears, and a woman who teaches her how to dance to the hidden music of the world. They see in her a gift, but must let her make her own voyage of discovery.

As Brida seeks her destiny, she struggles to find a balance between her relationships and her desire to transform herself.

Brida is a moving tale of love, mystery and courage, of the the spiritual side of eros and the erotic side of spirituality.

By The River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept


In all stories of love there is always something that moves us closer to eternity and the essence of life because the stories of love hold within all the secrets in the world.

But what happens when shyness prevents an adolescent love affair from developing? And what happens when, 11 years later, destiny brings the lovers together again? In the meantime, life has taught her to be strong and to hide her feelings. As for him, he is now a handsome spiritual teacher – with a reputation for performing miracles – who has turned to religion as a refuge from his inner conflicts.

Together they take a journey that is initially fraught with difficulty as blame and resentment resurface after years of being hidden. But by the River Piedra, in a small village in the French Pyrenees, they find a way to discuss many of life's big questions and re-evaluate their won special relationship.

By The River Piedra is a wonderful novel, with a poetic and transcendent narrative, that reflects all the mysteries of love and life.

The Witch of Portobello

Who is this mysterious woman called Athena? The orphan abandoned by her gypsy mother in Transylvania. The child taken to Beirut by her adoptive parents. The clerk working in a large bank in London. The successful real estate agent in Dubai. The priestess of Portobello Road.

The Pilgrimage

hmm..can't find the blurb for this one in the Net...
(all blurbs were taken and quoted from http://www.santjordi-asociados.com/titles.htm)

Therefore, I may conclude that :

4 books@RM120 + 3@RM90 + 2@RM20 equals SHOPPING ONLY IN DECEMBER.

I promise myself that I will only go shop crazy in December...

that is...if I can tahan.

devour...devour...devour

I was surprised when Al told me that Times is having a warehouse sale at Asia City. I went the next day. And the next day, this time with Al and Get. I saw the first two Twilight books and couldn't let it go. Then I saw Paulo Coelho books and I couldn't let it go either!!

Gosh...how can I afford to get five books??Eventhough there was the discounts and all, the sum is RM168!! I can buy a few pairs of shoes and dresses with that!!

Decisions...decisions....

I decided to take the Paulo Coelho books (The Alchemist and The Devil & Miss Prym) since I've read the whole series of Twilight and I thought completing my Twilight collection can wait.

But now I am in another roll for another complete collection...

I just got to complete the Paulo Coelho novels!! (hint: birthday pressie *wink**wink*...;-P)

Night out with my big bros

I've been dying to watch Night in the Museum 2- Battle of the Smithsonian for ages!!
So my brothers, Josue and Koko Eric finally brought me out to watch that movie at GSC Kota Kinabalu.

At the ticket counter, si Koko Eric pun membawa kami berbaris untuk membeli tikit.

"Kami mau tingu tu Night in the Musium 2...kasi yang palinnggggggg dapan ah!!"

Astaga.

Mati la sia.

Sakit la leher sia.

"Ohhhhh...kamu ni kan yang selalu pi di dapan...yah. ada tu dua orang selalu di dapan. Kamu la pula tu!" said the lady at the counter.

Koko Eric and my brother tersengih like kerang.

Sia mau minta tukar tempat duduk pun tidak dibenarkan...cos koko Eric said ko cuba dulu duduk di dapan. Best...according to him.

Nah. Terpaksalah.

I could feel the stares behind and I do feel like an idiot. But Koko Eric assured me it'll be fun.

2 hours later....

Siok juga duduk depan, tapi mau ada skill. Kamu bayangkan seja kamu limpang2 di sofa depan TV di rumah. That's my verdict.

But next time, I'm sitting in the middle pews.

P/S: The movie was very good though. I was laughing from beginning to end.

Teachers day at my school.

DOIII!! 2day we all hv a belated tcr day at school. I was surprised becos ada Grammy Award ala SMKS..lol. Guess wat. I was nominated as GurU paling berinovasi, Guru paling berketrampilan, Guru paling ceria, GurU palinG prihatin, Guru paling ceria and guru palinG Popular. Yaii! Lucu ni sa rasa. At least manang juga satu..SIA LAH GURU PALING CERIA DI SIDANG PATANG!! hahahahaha

Those Teaching Days

I know it's been a week since Teachers' Day. Been wanting to write something but I was too busy with extra curricular activities and all sorts. I was inspired by Robert Hayden's Those Winter Sundays and I wished to share this with everyone. It's not perfect, but hey, I need to work out my inner poet! So here goes...

Those Teaching Days

Weekends too I got up early
And put on my kurung in the blueback cold
then with hands that cracked
from chalk dust on the daily planner made
their banked anger blazed. No one ever thanked me.

I'd walk and hear the noise splintering, breaking
When they heard my footsteps, they called
and slowly disperse and digress
fearing the chronic angers of "Miss Felis Chaus"

Acting indifferently to me
who had sacrificed my weekend stroll
and planned my lessons as well
What do they know, what do they know
of a teacher's austere and grim offices?

Happy Belated Teachers' Day!

Alone again...naturally.

Another relationship bites the dust.

My fault actually, I said YES when I meant NO.

Daddy Long Legs and me are better of as friends.

Blame it on the age gap and the continent. Plus, I am just not ready to be someone's wife!

He said I was a heartbreaker. Made me laughed for a minute there, I find it hilarious (actually he meant it seriously).

It made me think for a while...I think I ain't ready for a serious relationship.

Choral Speakers...are u ready?

After much anticipation and practice, finally the inter district choral speaking competition was held at Dewan Semai Bakti, Desa Kenchana.

Well, it is a day of mixed feeling; gladness that the nightmare is almost over yet there is a sense of sadness that it's going to end and I still crave more experience in this venture. I was a bit nervous because this is my first major project and of course, our school's debut in choral speaking. It is our first time ever to participate and I'm humbled just because I'm part of it ;-)

Anyway, let's cut the story short.

At 12p.m, the results were announced...

We got THIRD place out of five schools competing.

Not bad for first timers huh?hehehe

School Camping!!

Last Friday, our UB had its first perlantikan camp with the boy scouts. It is my first official duty as an advisor as well. It was tiring but it was worth the while. Here are some photos taken during the camp ;-)

Enjoy!

Day 1 (Or night 1...whichever)
This is the "sidang" session where we give lecture to all the students about history, the pledge, songs and so on. There's my friend, Ner giving explanation about the P.Puteri pledge.

Day 2 : Crafts Day!
One of the tests the students had to take was Lencana Kraftangan. They have to create an original artwork using soap and plasticine. Yang pakai tupi tu is my friend, Syl.

This is one of their artwork...sori termiring...

The Skippers taking a look at our kids' creations. It seemed they find it difficult to judge which one is the winner.

Kamu rasa apa yang the student cuba sampaikan di sini?

Berposing with one of the teachers' kid. CUteeeee kan??
Nite 2: Malam Budaya
The girls practicing their "Sayang Kinabalu" song. It ended up the teachers becoming the gimmick sebab tiba2 pi ikut menari sumazau hehehe.

It's a pity it rained heavily that night, poor kids had to run and save their things before it all gets wet. Some slept in the garage hehehe...tulah namanya camping.

Day 3: Finale and Istiadat Perlantikan
The girls after we gave them their badges and scarfs. Ramai yang pengsan because of the hot weather.

Me giving a last minute speech...siap pakai heler lagi tuh...malas sia mau teriak2.

Me and my friends (background muka scouts yang penat). These people are the ones who had my back when all these happened. Thanks a lot, girls...hugs hugs...

The faces of happy campers and their happier-than-thou-cos-it's-done-we-can-rest-at-home teacher hohohohohoho

Tiring yet satisfying!

:-)

Bedebing dei deiiiiiii

fqjniwenwnfjwencfk nwqm;f

That's gibberish for a f**king day.

I don't know why everyone wants a piece of me today. Especially the vets (not pet doctors, veterans). For the first time in my professional life I was called by a teacher who just can't wait for 3 minutes. I was a bit delayed by an otherwise settled matter (if only that FFFF colleague did a good job on documentation) and it was really urgent that I had to be a little late for my last class.

Earlier, my class informed me that all their desks were stolen by the morning session students. Our class was the only class that did not share with morning session because of a flood episode early this year. Then, to my dismay and utter disgust, the key that I had installed yesterday had been destoryed by those ingrates! Even my ABMs and all my class decorations that I spent money and energy doing it was ripped and torn. Rebels without a clue!! Sudahlah buduh...kasi rusak harta benda sekolah ja dorang tau!!!

I've informed with the AJK yg incharge meja but they didnt really have good listening skills. Sudahlah tahap kronik kelas sia tu, dorang bilang sabarrrrrr...belum kena record lagi....

SH*T! This matter can be easily settled if only the basics like doors and desks were looked after at the beginning of the year.

What have I learned?

I learned to be resilient.

I learned to voice out my opinion and b*llsh*t lah if they refused to listen. How are we going to martabat kan the profesion if semua selfish???

I learned to be deaf -
deaf to toxic colleagues puns
deaf to excuses

I learned to be patient and know that any place I go there will always be people who just can't see other people's successes.

I hate idiots.